Goodbye.

How do you love someone
That hurts you oh so bad
With intentions good
Was all he ever had

But how do I let go when I've
Loved him for so long and I've
Given him all that I could
Maybe love is a hopeless crime
Giving up what seems your lifetime
What went wrong with something once so good

How do you find the words to say
To say goodbye
If your heart don't have the heart to say
To say goodbye

I know now I was naive
Never knew where this would lead
And I'm not trying to take away
From the good man that he is

But how do I let go when I've
Loved him for so long and I've
Given him all that I could
Was it something wrong that we did
Because others infiltrated
What went wrong with something once so good

How do you find the words to say
To say goodbye
If your heart don't have the heart to say
To say goodbye

Is this the end are you sure
How should you know when you've never been here before
It's so hard to just let go
When this is the one and only love I've ever known

So how do you find the words to say
To say goodbye
If your heart don't have the heart to say
To say goodbye

I know this is special

When all that matters doesn't anymore, what can you say?
How do you erase 3 years?
How do you dispose of thousands of memories, of thousands of wasted feelings, of thousands regrets?

How do we keep it real now?
I guess you're just like everyone else.

I'm done and over it
I'm with someone new,
I understand... You're happy.

Part I

There was something he wasn't telling me. I could feel it in the way he spoke, the intensity of his grasp on my wrist, the urgency of his eyes - Why couldn't he just say it? If it was I in his position, I'd trust in him; that four letter word should be enough to trust him.


In Denial:

Most of the days are kind of lagging lately. The situation I'd find myself in is always the one where I find myself weaker than normal, so why does it seem that every day it's been this person I can't understand?
This game I always end up playing is dangerous to myself and my own sanity. A few days of being ghost, a few days of being social and a few days of being me has always been such a hassle. Why is it I'm in such denial when it comes to the trials of my own being? I remember that feeling.. You know that feeling where you felt like you needed to sacrifice yourself for the being of someone else? That feeling where you think your life is finally on the right track and that you think your crazy .. and you don't recongnize your actions because it feels so real?
When you get broken down, judged and then you believe otherwise?

When you believe that your angel is your world, but your angel is the cause of your hurt and pain. Most importantly, your angel was nothing short of a regular imperfect being who brainwashed you in thinking that they were perfect for you. What is left to deny?

That, my friends, is Denial.